I ♥ you babe

Jan 4, 2009
1:29 AM

I started writing this probably about a month ago. I started out in a bitchy mood, but still couldn't stop thinking about what you really mean to me.



Even as a kid I was never the center of anyone's universe. I was never loved the way people deserve to be loved. I have always been a disposable person. Family, friends, boyfriends. I've always just been around, just existed, not really desired or loved. So I guess that's what I've always wanted. To be loved unconditionally. To love someone with my whole heart, and have them love me back with all of their own. To be completely vulnerable and open, but know that I am completely safe all at the same time.

I remember how scared I was to love you. Thinking how something so perfect couldn't actually be real. You are so perfect, and I don't know how you do it. So funny, caring, loving, with the wild bad boy shit all at the same time. Awesome friend, asshole, great listener, great lover. Professional, polite, rude, vulgar. Mental genius, halo freak, tv and fast food buff. Romantic, race car driver as long as you are in a car that can handle it, and sometimes even in ones that can't. You are everything from all the ends of every personality wrapped up in one package, and it all crashes together and works somehow. I know I will never find someone else as perfect as you.

On top of all of how amazing you are, you know me so well, probably better than I know myself. You have pushed me so far, helped me work through so much. You have told me before that I am your rock, well, you are the same to me. You can read me so well its scary sometimes. Honestly, no one really knows me better than you do, not my sisters, James, or anyone. And with that knowledge you have helped me do so many things. This year has been one of the hardest years for me, mentally anyways. Its hard enough just to hold it all together, let alone move forward with life. And I owe so much of my survival to you.

I love you so much, and I try to describe it all the time. And every time I write something from the heart it still doesn't come close to capturing what I feel inside. I don't think there will every be a way to describe it. And there are parts of it that I don't fully understand still. Parts of it that still scare me. Parts of it that still amaze me. I guess that's a good thing though. If I had it all figured out, then that would take all the fun out of it.

All I know is that when I am in your arms, all the bad shit in the world really does disappear. And when I roll over to kiss you while you're asleep, my heart still flutters a little. When we cuddle, I still get that overwhelming happiness that is so intense it makes me wanna cry a little, the same way I felt the first time I told you I loved you.

I <3 you babe.



Michael Burton
       I don't even know what to say. Other than I Love You.