What you were to me

Nov 16, 2006
9:12 PM

This makes number what? I am not even counting anymrore. Who wan'ts to count the number of times they have been broken. Or the number of times they have been stupid. The number of times they have fallen.

You have described to me what you felt we were. And I am sorry that you feel that way. Because to me, to me it wasn't just physical. If I wanted just physical I could have found it elsewhere. It was more than that. You were someone that I thought I could trust not to do this to me. I thought you were there for me. There to hold me, to listen to me. To sing on the phone while listening to music. You were the person I wanted to call when I went to bed, so your voice was the last thing I heard before falling asleep. When I said that I wanted to see you, I didn't want to just get you alone. I didn't really care where it was as long as I got to be near you, hold your hand, have your companionship.

But none of this really matters does it. We were the same people we were this summer. Have the same views and the same beliefs. The same desires and the same feelings. I don't see how it was going to be any different. I wanted you and you wanted me. But yet it all has to be so complicated.

But it's ok. It is better this way I guess. I need to focus on me, getting my life together. The fewer distractions the better. I am moving, and I am getting a new job. Things are going good. I don't need anything or anyone to bring me down.